こんにちは、総理大臣さん

Today was really bizarre and amusing. I went to Kichijoji to enjoy the nice weather and study for my midterms (ironically, it was Japanese Government). (Oh, funny side note, I saw the “manner police” go by – apparently they just make sure everyone is displaying good manners – how creepy). While I was sippin’ on my coffee, I heard some dude screaming over a loud mic, so I went to check out who it was, turns out it was Prime Minister Aso! I didn’t really recognize him at first, because he was kind of far away, but then as I got closer I could see his face. And there were a ton of guards and reporters and everything there, so it clicked pretty quickly. I heard a bunch of schoolgirls walking by being like “OMG IT’S ASO! ASO-SAN!!!” I could tell the secret service looked kind of suspicious of me when I took a picture, like I had a gun camera or something.
As I was standing there, this Japanese lady came up next to me, and was like “That’s Aso, you know.” And we got to talking, and apparently she had lived in America for a while. She was really friendly. So she offered to treat me to a meal, but I declined. But she wanted to show me where it was anyway, so we went off to this restaurant. She called the waitress over and asked her to draw me a map of the closest one to my house. She kept saying such un-Japanese, awkward things that made me laugh. Like she kept trying to set us up. She asked the waitress if she had a boyfriend, and if she was looking. Then she was like “maybe you can start dating! Just come here next time and maybe you marry!” And then the girl, looking horribly uncomfortable, said she had a boyfriend, and the lady was like “Oh, well you just become good friends then! You live near to each other, right?” I just kind of laughed uncomfortably and finally we left. The lady was really nice though, and she gave me a free meal ticket that she had been working at for a while (you need to eat at that restaurant like 15 times, and then you get a free meal, and she gave me her completed one).
On the way back to where Aso was speaking, she started talking about her niece and was like “how you feel about older Japanese women?” When we arrived, there were interviews going on everywhere. The lady was like “maybe I get you interview with Aso, you’re a politics major.” And so she went and started heckling the Secret Service dudes, being like “This man from America, he want speak to Prime Minister Aso!” I was kind of just standing behind her being like “no, no, no, I don’t, really.” But she didn’t listen. It was so embarrassing, but hilarious. And then this celebrity politician came out (she was a famous news broadcaster apparently, and now she is a member of the House of Councilors) and basically in the middle of her interview, the lady went up to her and was like “This man from America!! Meet him!” And the lady looked pretty uncomfortable, but was nice enough to come over to me and introduce herself and give me her business card. Then the lady was like “You two take picture together!!” But I got out of that one by pretending I forgot my camera. Then the lady asked the celebrity “You just got married, yes? That is pity.” I was kind of thinking ‘oh god, oh god, don’t try to set me up with this powerful politician who could have me deported at the snap of a finger.” Of course she didn’t, but it was a fear for a few seconds there.
Then after she left, the lady went on to shout at camera men filming interviews, being like “Hey! I got American here, want to do interview!” The reporters just looked confused, and then came up to me and were like “Sorry, we don’t speak English, so we can’t interview you.” I really hope none of her comments make it onto TV. And I really hope all of those moments of me in front of the cameras never air either.
Such a bizarre day, but kind of hilarious now that I look back on it.